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Not a bad Halloween

11/6/2010
As you might expect, we're pretty big fans of Halloween around here. It's a holiday built for imagination and getting creative, and what's more Crooked than dressing up like somebody else and demanding candy from total strangers? Not much.

Personally, this blogger is a little more taken with the whimsical side of Halloween - the fairies, super heroes, silly get-ups like hoboes and cowboys. All the death and gore and what not seems strange to be laying on little kids. Do they know what that stuff refers to? Maybe not. Maybe that's okay and better. But I always find it strange when a seven-year-old is running around in a Freddy Kruger get-up with blood dripping off his claws.

One kid came up to our door with a mask that had a bunch of nails coming out of his head (it's a movie reference, but I don't know crap about scary movies, so I have no idea which one). Still, had that kid watched that movie? Now that would be terrifying.

Yes, I'm a preserver of kids' innocence. I like kids to stay young - not naive, or hidden from realities, but young and somewhat innocent and not burdened by the world's dangers and evils. Which is why I really hated the nine-year-olds running around dressed up like "Lady GaGa." Now there's a costume conceived by a parent. Or, rather, ill-conceived. The sexualizing of little girls freaks me out. Fake boobs on a nine-year-old? What are you thinking? Terrible idea.

Not to mention that we live in Maine, where it was about 42 degrees out. Good weather for hot pants!

Our kids where a dragon and a wizard, respectively. My daughter was the wizard. More than one door-opener commented on what a nice witch she was, which bothered her to no end. She kept muttering that she was really a wizard, as anyone could see, but she didn't want to argue the point at the door because she was afraid she was going to get hosed out of some candy.

Which is another matter altogether. What do you do with all the candy? Let them gorge on it the first night and then throw the rest away? Allow them one piece for desert after every dinner and have the pile last until Christmas? Just chuck it all right away? Sell it to the dentist? It's just too much. Too much sugar and gummy stuff and automatic stomach aches. Our kids can hardly finish most of the bigger pieces. It's too sweet.

Then again, we're those hippy parents I hated when I was a kid. My folks didn't let me have sugar cereal, so when I got to college I ate nothing but Lucky Charms for a month. Dang if I don't still love those Lucky Charms. But no way I'm letting my kids eat them. They get Oatmeal Squares and Corn Flakes.

Have you had Oatmeal Squares? Holy smokes is that good cereal. High in fiber, too.


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